I love two men. I screw two men. I am in a relationship with them both, and they are both aware there is another. That is all they need to know, that is all I let them know. They don’t need to know a name; they don’t need to know anything, but that they are not alone in my heart.
They have accepted the situation. Stewart, because his life is too busy for the sort of obligations that are required in a relationship. Paul, because he loves me too much to tell me no. And because my sexual appetite is such that one man has trouble keeping up.
So we exist, two parallel relationships, each running their own course, with no need for intersection or conflict. It works for us, for them, and for me. I don’t expect it to be a long-term situation. I know there is an expiration date on the easy perfection of our lives.
I should have paid more attention, should have looked around and noticed the woman who watched it all. She sat in the background and waited, tried to figure me out. Saw my two relationships, the love between us, and the moment that it all fell apart.
She hates me.
I don’t even know she exists.
She loves them. I love them.
And they love me.
EVERYTHING else hangs in the balance.
FIVE HUGE STARS!!!
And that’s how it is. I fuck Stewart, I fuck Paul, and they both know about it. And the more I fuck one, the more turned on the other gets. The more competitive, aggressive, loving they become. It is a constant, whirling sea of sex. I love it, and they love it.
Speechless.
I…I don’t know what to say. It’s been a few hours now since I finished this book. A few hours for me to realize that this book, this journey, was all done. This story was a perfect example of fantasy escapism. If you don’t know that means, that’s okay. It’s a term I came up with while I was reading this. I don’t really know how else to describe it.
"Reading is the sole means by which we slip, involuntarily, often helplessly, into another's skin, another's voice, another's soul." ~ Joyce Carol Oats
I understand that you hate me. That you curse me for my greed. But if I’m okay with it, and they are okay with it, how is it anyone else’s right to judge?
I’m all for monogamy and all its swoony glory, but seriously…this story, as fucked up as the situation was, I wanted it; I wanted the fantasy that was Madison’s life. She has a relationship with two drop dead gorgeous men, a sex life to fucking die for, but never once was she ever cheating on the other. Both Stewart and Paul knew about each other; accepted and even embraced this unique situation. They both loved her, too, and she loved them both equally.
He worried about me. My safety, my happiness. Worried about losing me due to lack of attention. He wanted me to have a steady fuck, wanted someone to make up for the slack he couldn’t provide. He wanted someone safe, friendly. Someone I wouldn’t leave him for, but that would make me happy.
Stewart.
He’s rich, handsome and a workaholic. He loves Madison, but she will always take a backseat to his job. Their relationship is fucking explosive, raw and unapologetic. He wants her in his life, but knows he can’t give her everything she wants especially with her voracious sexual appetite. He just doesn’t have time to be there for her sexually, physically and emotionally. He also doesn’t want her fucking around with random strangers, so what does he do? Encourages her to have a boyfriend; another man in her life to fill the voids that he can’t provide her. But she will always belong to him. Crazy, right?! Fuck!
I love this man, who has not one stressed out bone in his body. He concerns himself with two things: surfing and keeping me happy. I love his outlook on life, a Bob Marley style philosophy. We fuck, we surf, and we love.
Paul.
He’s carefree, gorgeous and does nothing but surf and worry about making his Madison happy. He’s not rich by any means, but he and Madison are happy with what they have. They’re happy and in love regardless of Madison’s other life, a life with another man who holds the other half of her heart. Madison was very upfront with him from the very beginning and though he initially said he couldn’t share her, he eventually agreed to their unique relationship. He loves her unconditionally and understands why she won’t leave Stewart. He just wants to keep her happy. He is afraid to lose her and dreads the day when she will eventually have to choose.
They both own my heart now, an equal division fought over by two sets of blue eyes.
This, my dear reader friends, is one hell of a story. I have a huge love/hate thing for love triangles and cheating, but this was NOTHING like what I expected. I can’t even categorize it as a love triangle nor a story that involves cheating. Is it cheating when everyone involved is a willing participant? I don’t. This story was so much more than that. It was emotional, full of steam and drama, but it was so unpredictable. Just when I think I knew what was going on, it would skid to halt and go in another direction. The twist in the story made me even more anxious. I was glued to this book and just devoured this. It was some crazy shit, but fuck, did I enjoy every single moment of it. Crack book worthy for sure!
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