I can’t remember the last time I felt completely safe. Security seemed more like a luxury to me, reserved for those who were fortunate enough to have picture perfect childhoods. For those who didn’t bear the ugly scars that keep me bound in constant, debilitating fear. I’ve run from that fear my entire life. But when I met him, for once, I couldn’t run anymore.
He scared the hell out of me in a way that excited every fiber of my being. It wasn’t the tattoos or the piercings. It wasn’t the warmth that seemed to radiate from his frame and blanket me whenever he was near. It was just…him. The scary beautiful man that threatened to alter 23 years of routine and rituals, and make me face my crippling fear.
My name is Kami and I am constantly afraid. And the thing that scares me the most is the very thing I want.
“Don’t worry,” he smiled, pulling me into the hard warmth of his chest. “I’ve got you. I’ll always catch you when you fall.”
And just like that, Blaine had staked his claim on the untouched part of me that no living soul had ever moved. He had captured every fear, every reservation, and crushed them in the palm of his inked hand.
Author Disclaimer: Abuse is real- verbal, emotional, physical and sexual. It takes place all around us; it doesn’t discriminate against race or gender, wealth or poverty. It affects us all- those of us who’ve had to live through it, or watch it happen, even those of us who’ve only heard about it. We are all affected. We are all forever changed.
This is not a story for the faint of heart; this is the story of one woman’s very real struggle through a world against her, the people who hurt her, her real life demons and the people who showed her that every gray sky, no matter how dark, has a sun waiting to break through.
***Inspired by true events***
4.75-5 Stars
The scariest part about love isn’t love itself. It’s letting go and plunging into the unknown. It’s trusting someone with the very most sacred part of your heart. It’s allowing yourself to feel something foreign and uncharted, despite how much it terrifies the hell out of you.
It's been a couple days since I finished this book and I still don’t know what to say. I really don’t. One thing for certain is that I loved this book. This wasn’t easy an read; it’s emotional and I have to warn you, there were times where I had to put it down, take deep breaths, and compose myself before continuing. More than just that, I had to constantly remind myself of the heroine’s mindset, otherwise I would've gone crazy.
This. Is. Me. My situation isn’t fucked up. I’m fucked up. Completely, irrevocably, fucked up to my core.
Yep. Meet Kami, our heroine. This is her, in a nutshell. I’ve never met any character so set in her ways that it would take a bulldozer, a truck full of dynamite and a loaded cannon just to put a crack her wall. I’m not going to bullshit you, she will try your patience, but then all I had to do was remind myself that she’s extremely damaged and that alone would calm my twitchy palm. I will not go into any specifics, but just know her past is very traumatic.
She does not believe in love. To her love brings nothing but pain and misery. The only people she trusts are her roommates, Dominic and Angel, both damaged in their own right. She has a connection to them in which she doesn’t have with anyone else, until she meets Blaine.
Him. It was all him. Blaine somehow made me forgetme. The me that wasn’t allowed to feel all these beautiful, exciting things. The me that didn’t believe in happy endings. The me that was unlovable, and in turn, could never ever love.
Blaine was my more.
I had finally found my exception.
Oh Blaine -- sweet, wonderfully sexy, tattooed, pierced in all the right places Blaine. Not only does he make me squirm and my heart beat all tachycardic, but there’s so much more to him. So much, that my review will not be able convey how I feel about our Hero. He never gave up on Kami, no matter how hard she tried to push him away. He stood by her, meltdowns and all, and still remained non-judgmental at her side. I just LOVE HIM.
When you know, you know. And you don’t fight it. You don’t deny the inevitable. You free fall because you know there’s someone there to catch you on the other side.
There were a lot of little things that stood out for me that made this such a great read. Kami’s roommates are fantastic and I’m sure I’m not the first one to say this, but both Angel and Dominic need their own books. In addition, the narcissistic side of me loves the fact that the heroine was Asian (hi, fellow Filipino here **raises hand**). But the main and number one reason why I loved this book was because of all the emotion it evoked in me. It was difficult at times, yes, but Kami and Blaine’s story is so worth the read. Ms. Jennings: Bravo, Langaa. Bravo!
